… I want a smart, beautiful, compassionate, strong, inquisitive daughter. I want a daughter who's the version of me, minus the screwed-up childhood with subsequent hardcoded personality defects and insecurities. I want a daughter who is me, only more beautiful (inside and out), and more receptive of beauty.
I want a red-headed daughter who appreciates her hair color.
Or, I want a black-haired daughter who has never had to experience the self-loathing that often accompanies being a red-head.
I want a daughter, who is like the girls I see who I think are so much smarter, more beautiful, more caring, and happier than I am. I want a daughter like the girls who, you can tell by one look at them, were very loved and supported by their parents. I want a girl like the girls who could focus on becoming better people because they never had to worry where a meal was coming from, or if their grandfather would beat them at night.
I want a chance to know what a Crosley woman would be like if she had a proper start in life.
I simply want the chance to raise a daughter.
But with my luck, I'd raise a bimbo who kicks puppies and can't count to 50. I know simply birthing a child with female sex organs will guarantee me nothing, no matter how hard I try.
But I still want the chance. I want to hear "It's a girl." I want to buy dresses and My Little Ponies.
I just want a girl.
Man, you made me cry! I have two boys. I think I'm having another boy. Silly reason, but we've got three boys names picked out. Have since before we got engaged, and we can never agree on a girl's name through an entire pregnancy. I always say "Oh, no matter what, as long as it's healthy!" When I read what you wrote today though, I just realized how much I do want a little girl.
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