You bet your ass I'd go AWOL! I'm canadian... so my opinion may not count... but I'm a mother, and there isn't ANYTHING in this world more important than my children. I'm also a woman that left my career to be home with my son when I had no idea how we were going to make ends meet. But I figured it out and it was the best decision I EVER made.

Honestly it was her job to make sure she had adequate care for her child and I don't see how her elderly grandmother with three handicapped family members and 14 other children to care for seemed like a good idea. I agree they could have cut her a little slack but in the end it is a bigger responsibility than your average job and she needs to take responsibility for it and for making sure she has someone to care for her child otherwise she needs to to look for a way to discharge and be done with it.

I just came across this and am horrified. My biggest beef with US policies is how the right claim their country is full of family values - but in the end they don't value families at all...or maybe they only value certain kind of families.

@Beth Harte, if you're still reading this:

I think the point you're missing is that this woman was not going AWOL because of her personal preferences. She was going AWOL because the alternative would have been to do something that was harmful to her child.

Yes, when you join the Army you are expected to follow their rules and do what they say - unless that would require you doing something that's actually wrong. Then, the correct thing to do is to take a stand and refuse. Or do you really want an army composed of soldiers who will follow all orders, no matter how morally repugnant, without question or refusal? That's worked out really well over the course of history, after all.

Beth Harte: "What I have an issue with is people (male or female) who don’t think that they need to follow the rules *they* volunteered and pledged to follow."

Key word: VOLUNTEERED. You are in the military on a VOLUNTEER basis. We have not reinstated the draft. The Army allows soldiers to get out under a hardship discharge and it allows pregnant women to get out under a chapter discharge. There is NO REASON for them to impose this hardship on this mother when she has other options. Especially when they're pulling a bait-and-switch.

I am prior service, U.S. Army 1992-1995. I can attest from first-hand experience that the Army, or at least officers of the Army, will gladly break regulations and DIRECT ORDERS if it benefits them in some way. But if you so much as put one foot out of line they can and will punish you any way they see fit. I understand that there is a hierarchy and that that hierarchy is necessary for things to run as smoothly as possible during times of war but it does nothing for morale or troop performance if you are constantly screwing those troops over.

And yes, I would totally go AWOL in this woman's situation. They would *not find* me, OK?

The really pathetic part is that the Army has been cited as having one of the best daycare systems in the United States. Seriously, it is amazingly good. And yet, since I was in, I'm stunned to realize that they STILL have not improved the system to be more responsive to the needs of single parents. They are perfectly capable of bringing 24-hour home-based daycares on board for children of the deployed, even if it is only on a temporary basis until a relative steps up. If it doesn't work on a home-based level then they could start centers for that purpose. Why they haven't done so, I could not tell you.

This reminds me of the story of the dad who's 11 year old daughter disappeared shortly before he was set to be deployed for Iraq:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/07/13/earlysho...

I'm not for sure, just glancing over the findlindseybaum.com page whether or not her father has been deployed yet--in the original news report, it notes that his superiors were giving him as much time as he needed. Some commenters on another site noted that they thought he shouldn't be sent while she was missing because he wouldn't be able to concentrate on his mission, and could endanger himself and others.

Interesting note.

How much of a soldier do you think this mother (or any parent in this situation) will be when they're being treated like a convict, when their child is being punished by being put into the arms of complete strangers for a full year? Any chance you think she might do something reckless to be able to come home early? I would shoot myself in the foot without a second thought if it meant I could be (albeit dishonorably) discharged and stay home to take care of my child.

Perhaps she could have chosen to use this moment to become an open homosexual and let the military's raging homophobia do her a favor?? (Tongue in cheek.)

heh... I guess grad school is good for something ;)

I actually almost used this case as an example in the presentation I had earlier today (on feminism and power in international relations) as it problematises the category of the "soldier" as it conflates it with the "mother" but ended up going in a different direction.

Hell yes! I would go AWOL for my kid in a second! I've heard horror stories of new moms (6-8 wks postpartum) being deployed! This whole issue is appalling and horrifying. I would kill for my child and I would die for my child. Without a second thought, I would go AWOL.

Dear Feminist Breeder,

I completely agree with Suzanne...

I don't have a "blame the mother" sentiment at all. Anyone who joins the military knows the rules. What I have an issue with is people (male or female) who don't think that they need to follow the rules *they* volunteered and pledged to follow.

That said, if her commanding officer lied and threatened her, he/she should be dishonorably discharged. And there should be a complete investigation because there might be more people who are experiencing the exact same situation.

Again, we don't know the real story.

BTW, my brother had to get an H1N1 vaccine today otherwise he'd be disobeying a direct order. So to think your not government property is not being realistic.

The struc­ture has been opened up to a cer­tain extent to “allow women in” with­out chang­ing the fun­da­men­tals of the assump­tions. This case is an impor­tant cri­tique of how the dis­course is out­dated and doesn’t rep­re­sent the world today… if it ever did.

I am in LOVE with this comment. Said so perfectly.

@Beth Harte

To answer your question, Yes, I would absolutely feel the same whether this happened to a female parent or a male parent. If this was a male officer, and he had nobody to care for this baby, I would be equally as upset if he'd been jailed because of it. But the bigger question is WOULD this ever happen to a man? Probably not - because A.) there are very few single fathers who don't have a baby mama around to help them with their child (by comparison to single mothers with NO help) and b.) the U.S. military is a boy's club. I don't see them doing this to one of their own. Had they, though, I'd be just as angry for that father.

And I called you out because you were the only person on Twitter who responded to me with the "blame the mother" sentiment. Disappointingly, comments like that make it obvious that you have no children. People with children don't think that foster care is a fine place for them, no matter what mom's supervisor says.

Dear Feminist Breeder,

I am not an expert on the Army, I don't know the backstory (i.e. what the actual truth is & not what the media portrayed), and I don't have kids...so, putting a spotlight on me probably makes no sense.

My only question would be if this happened man...would you feel the same?

Beth Harte@bethharte

Short answer: Yes, if I was in that exact situation, I would definitely refuse to deploy.

Long answer: Instead of just not showing up - the "crime" in this situation - I would have shown up with my baby and spoken directly to the highest ranking officer I could find. As a military spouse, I want to point out (like Reiza said above) that forcing a single parent to deploy without a plan for their child(ren) is absolutely against Army policy. If her superiors lied to her, intimidated her and scared her into thinking foster care was her only option they should be severely punished. All branches of the military have rules in place to protect children and families - I know a guy who was released from service on a hardship discharge because he needed to care for his baby during his wife's treatment for a mental condition - and if they aren't being enforced then SHAME ON THE ARMY.

But I do have to say...once you enlist in the military - especially the Army, especially during wartime - you need to be prepared to do your job. This case is exceptional, because her circumstances had changed and her childcare fell through, but I still feel like simply having a baby shouldn't exempt her from completing the duties she's been paid to do.

Foster care?! Are you F*ing kidding me? They should have at the very least delayed her deployment to the next round going over (yes, I know there are certain regiments you belong to, but, geez, make an exception). And why is no one else mentioning her mother in all this? She's the one that had said she'd take care of the baby only to turn around at the last moment and say no, with no alternatives (that we've heard). Maybe she should have looked at possible other help that way.

And yes, I can't imagine this situation because I would never enlist. You must think of all possible scenarios when you do enlist - and be ready for the commitment you're making. The army has rules to protect itself, but sometimes policies need to be adjusted in certain situations.

You're damn right I would! But I also would never enlist in the army. I don't know if the rules are the same in Canada as they are in the States but JUST before I opened your post today I read the news bulletin on this off twitter and I was Disgusted by this. I don't care about the army's fricking rules! There's a baby's life at stake here. They were going to let this child be taken into Foster care so the mom could do her job? Can't she just make the time up later? Wow! I'm so horrified... if my opinion actually mattered on this, like if I was a US citizen you'd be sure I'd be calling someone of some authority to complain about this. Land of the free my ass! (sorry patriots of the US...just a little left-winged Canadian having a hissy fit)

How AWFUL!!!!I would go AWOL!

this just shows how the liberal system of "rational individuals" ignores how they are embedded in a structure... the regulations and constitution of "the soldier" brings up an image of a man who can leave all his responsibilities behind with the wife if he has any family at all. The structure has been opened up to a certain extent to "allow women in" without changing the fundamentals of the assumptions. This case is an important critique of how the discourse is outdated and doesn't represent the world today... if it ever did.

As a former military wife, I can COMPLETELY see how this could happen, but it makes no sense at all. First and foremost, she was told her deployment would be delayed, but at the last minute, they changed that for some unknown reason. We were in a similar situation years ago where dh was told for months that he wouldn't deploy with the rest of his group (I'm purposely using generic terms so as not to give away too much about his branch) only to find out just days before that he actually WAS deploying.

What people who bitch about this mom don't realize is that the military was going against their own regulations to send her. She did NOT have childcare lined up and that's something you must have to be deployed.

She was told she would get extra time to attend to that and at the last minute, they changed their minds. WHAT? That made absolutely no sense at all.

In regards to the one who said you have to follow the Army's rules, the ARMY wasn't following their own regulations in this case.

As a former military wife, there's lots I want to say on this, but I'll just put this much out there and see where the discussion goes before I write a freaking novel.

I would absolutely go AWOL. No question.

Maybe because many feminists have surrendered to the male rules of power and domination.. don't you ever get the ugly looks from feminists for being a mom? Like saying: how dare you be a feminist and have children!! I get the most horrific comments all the time about how birth and pregnancy are gross and humiliating for women and that if I chose to be a mom then I should live with it and just stay at home and stop bugging.

Wow, wow, wow. Well, my gut reaction is that is terrible. My heart breaks for her for having to make such a difficult choice, for ever being put in that situation.

I get that she "signed up" for this service, that it's pretty clear what's expected of you when you do sign up, but that doesn't mean I don't think there should be some support in place for situations like this, like the Army should have definitely helped to find some acceptable (i.e. not a foster care situation) alternative for childcare or at least given her more time to do the same on her own.

However, I guess we would have to expect that the Army would do the same thing for any single father in that position, right? I'm certainly not opposed to that, either.

Man or woman, I think it's heartbreaking for any parent to be put in such a position and not provided adequate support to find alternative solutions.

That is totally, totally horrifying. I can't believe that the military would expect a mother to place her child in foster care. In fact, I can't believe that they would deploy the single mother of an infant in the first place. :(

I honestly can't say for certain what I would do in that situation. I wouldn't consider enlisting in the first place, so I have to put myself in a very different frame of mind. But there's no way that I would put my kid in foster care, so I guess if that's the only alternative I would go AWOL.

That's outrageous! I would absolutely go AWOL for my child. Perhaps they thought she was just trying to "get out of it" or something--I mean, that's the only thing that I think of that could explain their ridiculous actions--but even then, it's still wrong and quite infuriating.

Great new look BTW!